Transitions With Jean Blog

Family Pledge

Nov 9, 2022

There is no place like home. It is the reason we all get together over the holidays. Can you smell the traditional foods? Whether it is turkey and sage dressing, pumpkin pie, fried potato pancakes, Christmas cookies or stollen,… can you smell it now?

Just thinking about it takes my heart back home.

I looked for the definition of “home” and I liked the response that defines home as a “safe haven and comfort zone”. It isn’t about a house or a structure, it is about a feeling. Home is a place where life happens, and memories are made. It is a friendly atmosphere.

There are very special days right around the corner: Thanksgiving, Hanukkah, Christmas. Many of us have been away from large family gatherings for over two years. You remember what they were like? For many of us, it consisted of everyone converging on one house, where the host prepared a feast for everyone to enjoy.

Will you revert to doing things the way you have always done it in that past: the good and bad?

Will you decide that you have had two years of peace and quiet, so forgo the torture of seeing everyone again?

Will you take this opportunity to renew the love and friendships that come with family? Will you create new traditions and teach your children and grandchildren what it means to be a family?

Here is my proposed family agreement, maybe you would like to share it with your loved ones.

Our Family Pledge:

Whereas, making a holiday dinner is a lot of work and it is very expensive, therefore, we will all contribute to making it successful. After checking with the host, we will all bring something of significance to share with others. I will bring_______________________________________

Whereas, some of the “children” are over 18 years old, therefore they will also share the gift of bringing something, even if it is milk or dinner rolls.

Whereas, we have joined together to share the good in each other, therefore, there will be no conversation that includes politics, or religion, or vaccines, or any hot buttons that we know cause conflict.

Whereas, some people just don’t know what we are talking about, therefore, they will read the line above again.

Whereas, the host has probably spent a week getting ready for this event, and worked to make a fabulous meal, therefore, they shall be banned from the kitchen after dinner so that we can all clean up.

Whereas, it isn’t the job of the women to do all the work, therefore, the other half of the attendees will do the dishes without any whining.

Whereas, we all know alcohol can make a fire burn brighter, therefore, we will be conscious of what we are taking in and how it affects us.

Whereas, we are a family and throughout it all, we love each other, therefore we will treat each other with respect, we will be kind, we will share.

Signed, with hugs and kisses: ________________________________________-

The holidays aren’t just about us having a great day. They are about making sure those around us have a wonderful day, also.

Jean Long Manteufel writes a column on the first Sunday of each month about life changes associated with aging. Send your questions to or call 920-734-3260