Generations gather before dinner.
A few years ago, I had a fun quiz about how to approach family gatherings over the holidays. Here are more questions for you to consider. There is no perfect answer, just food for thought.
1. The family dinner is the highlight of the day. It means so much to Mom to have all of us together. I will:
a. Bring milk. Afterall, that is contributing.
b. Be appreciative even if someone brings a dish that isn’t “traditional”.
c. Offer to host so Mom can take a break this year.
d. Stay home. Bah Humbug.
e. Be grateful for having people to share time with.
2. As everyone gathers before dinner, I will:
a. Be bored out of my mind. What a great time to get out my cellphone and play some games.
b. Regale everyone with my stories. Their lives are so boring. Surely, listening to me talk about me is the highlight of their day.
c. Talk to the newer guests to make sure they feel welcome. What an opportunity to learn more about them.
d. Rant about “Kids these days”. This works especially well if there are young people there. They need to hear it.
3. During dinner conversations, I will:
a. Ask everyone to share a favorite memory of holidays past.
b. Use this as my opportunity to educate my delusional family members of how correct my political choices are.
c. Remember that this family can be a bit overwhelming; include in-laws and new guests in the conversations.
d. Ask everyone what their favorite part of this past year has been.
4. When dinner is over, I will:
a. Sit in the recliner and nap. That big meal wore me out.
b. Push the workers out of the kitchen and help clear the table. Offer to wash the dishes.
c. Let the women do the clean-up. It is their job.
d. Fix another drink. Afterall, the booze here is free.
5. Dad repeats himself often. I have heard this story before. I should:
a. Remind him that we don’t need to hear this again.
b. Cut him off and talk about me.
c. Remember that if you want the kids to know family history, this is a great way to pass it on.
d. Consider that someday I will miss his stories.
e. Get out my cellphone and ask if I can record one of those stories. Share.
6. Mom and Dad are obviously no longer able to keep the house up. I will:
a. Laugh at Mom and crack jokes about her failing housekeeping skills.
b. Help. Don’t criticize, just lend a hand.
c. Take this opportunity to remind them yet again that they should sell the house and move.
d. Enjoy the time together. Wait until a better time to have that conversation.
Yes, it is your holiday, but the holiday belongs to everyone. Help make it memorable for others. As the saying goes, “Live, Laugh, Love”.